"Main Character Energy" is a Dead End, But the Magic Endures With This Ancient Approach

Chances are, you've heard of “Main Character Energy", the popular Gen Z concept that is everywhere. It promises confidence, independence, and glamour. It tells you that you are the protagonist of your own life and are empowered to make every decision in your own best interest, as everything always works out for the main character. Certainly, placing yourself in the same league as Hollywood A-listers and Golden Era icons feels empowering. Who wouldn’t want to be at the center of the story?

But here’s the difficult truth: living like the main character of a film eventually collapses under its weight. It asks you to perform constantly, but it does not give you anything solid to stand on. There is, however, an ancient alternative that is far more magical in the long run.

Originating on TikTok, Main Character Energy promises this: that life will feel cinematic, every outfit will be iconic, and every setback will play out like a dramatic plot twist leading to something better, and it's usually there on film for you (usually on TikTok). It encourages you to sip your coffee as if it were a film scene, to choose friends like a supporting cast, and to measure work not by meaning but by how impressive it looks to others. MCE suggests that confidence can come from performance, that relationships exist to highlight your story, and that ordinary moments—laundry, traffic, dishes—can be ignored because they do not fit the script. (It also oddly seems that antagonists are never the stars of these stories).

The bedrock of Main Character Energy, when you peel back the layers, assumes that life should revolve around you. But the irony is that it often makes you dependent on the very people you are trying to outshine. If your role is to be the star, you need an audience. That means your sense of worth depends on other people noticing you, admiring you, or validating your story.

Without that, the illusion fades.

It also assumes that your life will follow a story arc designed for entertainment. But the hard reality is that real life is not a film, a career setback does not always turn into a breakthrough and a breakup is not always followed by a dramatic reunion. Sometimes the hard seasons stay hard. And if you believe you are the main character, these moments feel like personal failures instead of ordinary parts of being human.

Not to mention, Main Character Energy narrows your perspective. If you are always focused on how you appear, you stop asking deeper questions about who you are becoming in line with your calling. You become so invested in the performance that you miss the substance.

The end road of Main Character Energy is disillusionment. You either burn out from constantly performing, or you realize that the applause you wanted does not satisfy. You may look glamorous on the outside, but inside, you feel exhausted and unseen. This does not mean you should stop caring about your life or stop pursuing beauty, confidence, and success, but it does mean that chasing those things through performance and perception will never give you what you truly want.

There is an alternative that brings even bigger and better confidence. It is not about diminishing yourself, but about grounding yourself. Strong character, built on virtue and steadiness, creates the kind of confidence that does not crumble when life is unglamorous. And it still allows you to enjoy beauty, glamour, and success in a way that is real and even more captivating.

The idea of “character” is not a modern invention. It has deep classical roots, stretching back to the Greeks and Romans, who believed that the true measure of a person was not in their image but in their virtues. The Greek word ethos gave us the word “ethics,” which describes the habits and dispositions that shape who a person becomes. Aristotle famously wrote that we are what we repeatedly do, and from this came the understanding that character is not a single act but a cultivated pattern of choices.

For the ancients, character was inseparable from virtue. Plato pointed to the ordering of the soul around truth and goodness which is exemplified in beauty. Aristotle identified four “cardinal virtues” as the foundation of a flourishing life: prudence (wise judgment), justice (fairness and integrity), temperance (self-mastery), and fortitude (courage in hardship). These were not abstract ideals but practical guides for living. A person who developed these qualities could withstand life’s unpredictability and contribute to the well-being of their family, city, and society.

Character was seen as the foundation of life because it offered stability in a world where circumstances could not be controlled. Wealth, beauty, and influence were fragile and fleeting, but virtue could not be taken away. Strong character meant you could endure suffering without losing dignity, succeed without arrogance, and serve others without resentment.

So, how do you build a strong character... not channel the Main Character?

First, build confidence through discipline. Instead of waiting to “feel” confident, create it by keeping promises to yourself. Set a small goal and achieve it. This could be finishing a project, sticking to a budget, or working out consistently. Confidence grows when you learn you can trust yourself.

Second, make glamour an act of care, not performance. Dressing beautifully and caring for your appearance do not need to be about attracting an audience. It can be about cultivating dignity, self-respect, and honoring others. Choose clothing that highlights your femininity, invest in quality pieces, and practice small daily rituals—like skincare or fragrance—that make you feel composed even when no one is watching. Try to stay offline as much as possible when looking for inspiration; it will most certainly make you feel less confident in the end.

Third, redefine success as growth, not attention. Success is not how many people are applauding, but how much you are growing in wisdom, skill, and virtue. Keep a journal where you track progress in your career, habits, or spiritual life. Look for milestones that show inner growth rather than public recognition.

Fourth, surround yourself with substance. Choose books, mentors, and friends who challenge you to think deeply and point out places you can grow. Spend time with people who inspire you because of their character, not their following. When you are surrounded by substance, you begin to crave it for yourself.

Finally, embrace mystery. Some of the most glamorous women in history were not noticed every moment of their lives. What made them admirable was how they lived in private. This is the final principle of Elegance, after all. Practice being at peace in ordinary moments. Cook a meal, keep your space beautiful, or write a letter. These things may not be broadcast to the world, but they shape you in ways that last.

Your twenties and thirties do not need to be a constant performance. They can be a time to cultivate real confidence, experience beauty without pressure, and define success in a way that will not collapse when trends shift. Main character energy is a dead end, but a strong character is a foundation. Funnily enough, the paradox is that when you stop living to be noticed, you often become far more captivating than when you tried to be the star.